Tuesday, April 5, 2011 | By: Mary Wright

Late Night Jokes!

Hehehe. It's 2:30 am...but I didn't want to go to bed, without another post...so I thought I would find some jokes to share with people. *smiles*

Tomorrow, I will be finding jewelry in Garnet, in honor of my boyfriend's (and my partner girlfriend's) birthstone.

Well...let's see what I can find in the humor department. Sadly, it's 2:35, so funny now...may not be too funny tomorrow. *laughs*


A mature lover went to a jewelry store to buy some gift for his girlfriend. He selected a locket.
“Don’t you want her name engraved upon it?” asked the jeweler.
The lover thought for a moment, and replied, “No, just engrave it: To My One and Only Love. This way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again.


Date of Joke: Tuesday, 25th May, 2004

A white-haired old man walked into a jewelry store on a Friday, with a beautiful young lady at his side.

"I'm looking for a special ring for my girlfriend," he said.

Our jeweler looked through our stock and took out an outstanding ring priced at $5,000.

"I don't think you understand-I want something very unique," the man said.

At that, our now very excited jeweler went and fetched our special stock from the safe. "Here's one stunning ring at $40,000."

The girls eyes sparkled, and the man said that he would take it.

"How are you paying?" asked our jeweler.

"I'll pay by check; but of course the bank will want to make sure that everything is in order, so I'll write a check and you can phone the bank tomorrow, and then I'll fetch the ring on Monday."

Monday morning, our very disappointed jeweler phoned the man. "You lied, there's no money in that account."

"I know, sorry, but can you imagine what a FANTASTIC weekend I had?"


Mel and his wife are walking down Main Street one evening. They stop at a jewelry store window.

She says, "Mel, I'd love those diamond earrings."

He says, "No problem.�
 and takes a brick out of his pocket, smashes the window, and gets the earrings for her. They walk away hastily and soon come upon another jewelry store.

In the window, there is this gorgeous diamond ring, and the wife says, "Mel, oh please, please, please, get me that ring."

He looks around, sees there's nobody around, takes a brick out of his pocket and hurls it at the window.

Now she's got the earrings and this great ring, and they walk away... until they come to yet another jewelry store.

There's this fantastic diamond necklace in the window. She starts begging, "Mel, Mel, just look at it. I need it!"

He looks at her and says "Whaddaya think, I'm made out of bricks?"


(a little risque)

There is this young attractive married woman who wants expensive jewelry, designer clothes and fast cars but her husband is not so well off. One day, she comes home late wearing a gold necklace. Her husband, who has been waiting for her, asks, “Where did you get that necklace.”

The woman says, “I won it at the bingo.”

Three days later, the woman again comes home late wearing a mink coat. Her husband asks, “Where did you get that mink coat?”

The woman says, “I won it at the bingo.”

A week later, the woman comes home driving a brand new Jaguar. Her husband asks with suspicion, “Where did you get that car? At the bingo?”

The woman snaps back, “Oh shut up! I’m too tired to talk to you! Why don’t you just be a good boy and prepare a hot bath for me. I need to relax.” The husband stomps off to the bathroom.

A few minutes later, the woman enters the bathroom only to find the bath tub with very little water. She calls for her husband and demands to know why the bath tub isn’t filled with water.

Her husband replies, “I don’t want your bingo card to get wet!”


Well, hope you enjoyed....I need to sleep. I hope that everyone will have a great night, and a great day tomorrow!


Woot! Followers!

Weeee! I am up to a whole 8 followers! *snickers* It's funny, since I have been trying to build up my follower base on Twitter...but I know, it comes, slowly but surely. (and don't call me Shirley!)

Who would have thought something like that would excite me so much...except that it's 2:30 am, and I really should go to sleep.

But...I feel like I need to make another post, since I haven't today...so I think I will make a joke post.

And maybe tomorrow, I will do another random birthstone jewelry post...since my boyfriend's birthstone is garnet, I will find some pretty garnet jewelry to share!

Until then........*smiles*